Week 9: Hitting Full Stride

This week was unlike any other in Richmond- it was memorable and joyous not because of any special trips or events, but because of the feelings that come with being truly accustomed and acclimated to a situation. This does not mean that I consciously felt uncomfortable or unfamiliar in my journey before this week, but I believe that subconsciously there was a piece of me still feeling like an unbelonging foreigner. This may just be a part of the natural cycle of emotions that one goes through when becoming acquainted to new surroundings (I recall the same feelings my freshman year of college).

Ironically, these feelings are coming in the wake of my apartment being turned into a barren landscape. Mike, the guy who I am subletting from, moved all his furniture out a week ago, leaving me nothing but a borrowed air-mattress in my room, and nothing but a single chair, computer, and computer desk in our living space. The heat has also been oppressive lately, causing me to seek other oasises of air conditioning where I can read and write. Tonight I am enjoying the studious atmosphere at one of VCU’s libraries.

Couches are gone

So is my bed, desk, and dressers

All we're left with in a computer

In addition to feeling more “at home” in Richmond, I reached a point at Boaz & Ruth where the intricacies and inter-workings of the organization are finally becoming familiar to me. I never would have envisioned a nine month process of acclimation, but with a client base as unpredictable as ex-offenders, a high staff turnover, and a multi-faceted program it is understandable why it has taken so long. Now, I am prepared for, or at least insensitive to, the low-points in a day that used to take more of a toll on me. I am learning more a more about the way a criminal lifestyle affects behaviors and thought processes, for some even after they have moved passed the low points in their life. This understanding has come with increased one-on-one time with apprentices.

For example, I interviewed Melvin for about 2 hours on Monday for a fundraising appeal letter I was writing in which I was going to use his story. While he wouldn’t go into too much detail about his specific criminal activity, he mentioned repeatedly how he felt like he was “outside of his mind and looking back at himself” while he was committing the crimes. It was almost as if this removed mental state was what allowed him to justify his actions. Later, we stopped by the DMV so he could determine the accumulation of fines and tickets he needed to pay off before pursuing his license again. The total was well above $2000, mainly due to a night, as he recalls, which involved at least 10 police cars chasing him. Knowing Melvin as I do now, I could not imagine him as even a petty criminal, which is why his “out of mind” theory strikes a chord with me.

On Tuesday evening, I got the chance to spend a few hours with Doug as we working together on a side-job of moving some furniture that he had lined up. Douglas is a spirited and hard-working individual, so I was happy to help him out and make a few extra bucks while I was at it. At the same time, he can be sneakily manipulative, often calling on me to help him rearrange furniture in the store during the workday when plenty of others without work to do are sitting around. He claims it is because I help him out without complaining, while everybody else makes a big deal about him telling them what to do. I could see this side of him come out again on Tuesday. Since we were charging by the hour, he told me that we should, “work real hard in the beginning to show her that we weren’t messing around, and then milk the clock a little at the end.” Whether this is just part of Doug’s personality or a result of his criminal background, I don’t know. In fact, I’m not entirely sure these things are separable once one becomes a criminal.

A while ago, Melvin told me I should treat my experience at Boaz & Ruth as an opportunity to observe the interaction of “all these criminal minds.” While I don’t often think of my internship in this regard and I try to look past the negative history of these people’s lives, it does help to take a step back at times and remember the tendencies of those I work with.

Surprisingly, that’s about all I have to write on this week. My weekend was pretty uneventful minus two concerts I attended- Nickel Creek and The Black Crowes. In fact, it was good to have time to relax by sleeping in until noon and to attempt to stay cool in the stuffy apartment. I am recharging for what should be an incredible sprint to the finish, which now only lies two weeks away.